February 09, 2008
Eros
I love his smell. His touch. Everything!
I went home ths weekend because I had some business to take care of. And I decided- hey! I have a car. Why not go up to VCU since I have nothing else to do. So I did. He was at work, and parking was crazy, but I finally got there. He didn't see me when I walked in, so I just sat down and watched him. And when he saw me... it was amazing. I could see he wanted nothing more than to hop over the counter. And when he finally could, what an embrace!
I love it when he hugs me because it's almost like he's just collapsing into me. Like life is crazy and hectic until he's in my arms and I love it! I could hold him all day long.
I'm glad he didn't see me when I first walked in, not only for the whole surprise element (well, kind of), but also because walking in and seeing him, my legs went weak. When I sat down, I couldn't even cross them they were shaking so bad.
Anyway, I got there around 2:30 and he didn't get off till 4, so I mostly just watched him work, but when there were no customers, he'd come sit and we'd chat before the next bunch came in.
It was really nice to see him. All this time I've been scared that I only liked the idea of him, that it wasn't real. So it was good that I went and saw him. And I almost didn't. I thought it might be a bad idea. But no! Now I am certain that I love him. It's not imaginary.
When he got off, China showed up of course. And some other people. Before China, Bobo was there. I really like her. She's from England and is just very down to earth and great. So yeah, when everyone started coming (mainly China) I got restless and decided it was time to go. They all wanted me to stay, but I was eager to return to campus anyway.
And he walked me back to my car. Alone. I was really surprised China didn't come. I wonder how much people down there know. Does Bobo know about us? Has he been talking about it at all? I never know how to act because I'm not sure how much I should reveal...
Anyway, so we walked to my car, arm in arm. Oh, how wonderful it was! But it was super hard to leave! He kept holding on to me, but I would leave, only to go back and hug him again. I love how my nose fits in the crook of his neck.
I just love all these little things. And I miss him. I really do. Not in the way that it hurts because we're not together, but more in a way where I feel like something's missing and I can't quite name it.
Yeah, Eros has shot me with an arrow.
Oh, and the strangest thing! Before I left for Richmond, I left him a hello on facebook because I was trying to see if he was still on. Apparently he has access to a computer at work! And he said he hecked like right before I walked in and thought she's here, and then there I was. Isn't that amazing? I don't know, just the way things have been happening lately.
Everything seems to point towards him...
scullerymaid at 8:27 p.m.