December 28, 2007
Ignorant people
My grandmother drives me to insanity. The things she says! They can be so hurtful, or downright stupid.
The other day the delinquents in our family were brought up. You know... there's one in every family blah blah blah. Well, someone said they'd never have to worry about. That I was the good one and Squirt was the trouble maker. I was a little embarrassed, but I guess it was a nice compliment, especially if Aunt May was the one who said it, but I'm not sure. Then Grandma, in all her wisdom and knowledge, says that "we don't know that yet. She's still in college." What's that supposed to mean? Oh, I know exactly what it means and my blood was very near boiling for a few minutes.
She doesn't trust me. I know that's what everyone says and that it's more false than it is true, but she thinks I'm going to make some great mistake and end up into trouble. Apparently all these years of being responsible isn't enough. Apparently being the sister, a good student, not going to parties, and being as respectful as possible wasn't enough.
It's because Popeguy and I talk about getting an apartment, where we may possibly share the same room. Shouldn't my family be glad that I share my life with them. I've never kept secrets. If I sleep with a gay boy, I tell them. If I tasted the wine, I let them know. Hell, if I accidently said shit or whatever in front of Squirt, I don't deny it. I tell them before he does. But it's not good enough.
She thinks Popeguy "goes both ways," as Mom told me. Grandma seriously believes this boy who is repulsed by the things under a girl's clothes, is waiting to... get together? I don�t understand her logic. Why does she think this way? I mean, how can she possibly know whether he goes just one way or tinkers with the other? Who does she think she is saying all this?!?! How can she doubt me? She probably thinks I'm going to end up pregnant and dropping out of school or something.
Okay, my morals are a little higher than that. I might be confused about what I believe, but I'm not that confused and/or stupid!
Guess I won't be telling them that I slept with two guys the other night. And the one that was holding me was shirtless! (Don't panic, it was only Popeguy and Peace! No big deal. Not some random guys I wasn�t very good friends with) Guess I really can't let them know what my life is like. Because they obviously can't handle it. Which, I don't usually tell her anyway. It's Mom and Dad that I talk to, but it seems that they just go and tell the rest of the family! So I suppose it's time I cut them off. When we talk on the phone I'll keep my part of the chatters to hums and the occasional one word answer.
How they infuriate me. I never wanted them to be in the dark. I've always been on the level with them. Not that I've ever done anything where they needed to be in the dark. But whatever. If they can't trust me, then I guess I'll have to give them reason to... or maybe not to depending on how they puny brains interpret it. No more talking from me.
I have my diary, and I'll do my best to be as open here as I was with them.
scullerymaid at 1:23 p.m.