September 24, 2005
Florence is a superstitious place
I don't know why I feel the way I feel. I keep making things up so that I won't admit the truth.
I'm starting to worry about the plane again. I really need to stop. I will get on it. I'm just scared I'll never get off and I'm even more afraid to say it in case I jinx myself or something. I don't think I'm a superstitious person though.
My Grandma Florence was superstitious so sometimes it's fun to just pretend. It's like I have some link with her. Sometimes I wish I could talk to her. She wouldn't just give me her opinion and leave it at that. She would really talk to me. She wouldn't choose sides simply because her son was involved. I miss her. I wish she hadn't of lived so far away so we could've been closer.
I would talk to Granny because we're pretty close, but I don't want to lay my burden on her. I don't want to lay my burden on anyone.
I pray she has good health for many more years. I hope she can see my wedding. Maybe even be a great great grandma. Then I wonder if that's a little selfish of me. Or maybe I'm just crazy and need to stop thinking so much sometimes.
I could never talk to Grandma.
scullerymaid at 9:13 a.m.