January 03, 2010
Still alone
I have this overwhelming sense of betrayal. Like I'm being left behind once again. But it doesn't surprise me so I don't know why I let it bother me so much.
As is well known, Popeguy is going to Argentina. And that's great. I'm really proud of him and it will be one of the most memorable experiences of his life. And when he gets back, he's moving with this older gay couple he knows and is forgetting about me once again. He always forgets about me. He always just leaves me to fend for myself. What would have happened to me if Snortgiggles didn't need someone to live with her? Where would I be? Alone. Always alone.
You know, I stay here and I make sure he has support in whatever it is he wants to do and what do I get? A nice birthday surprise. Which I love. And I know he cares about me and that we are best friends. But why does he always...ignore me?
He blubbers about how he would simply shut down if his bf died tomorrow. But what about me? You know, when he goes to Argentina, his bf isn't the only person he's leaving. I've been here longer and will be here long after the bf is gone. But no one seems to care how I feel, least of all Popeguy. He means so much to me but he can make me feel so unimportant. And to top of going to a foreign country, we won't be living together anymore. No more saying I'll see you at home or lets watch a late night movie or cook dinner. He's leaving me just like he did that first summer.
And yet I stay here. Why? Why do I stay if I'm nothing more than a convenient friend. A safe mat that is here when he needs it, but forgotten when he has more important people to think about.
scullerymaid at 10:35 p.m.