June 22, 2009
Would you like jelly with that?
So...
After much consideration and analyzing, I've decided that I'm simply never going to like Popeguy's boyfriend. This whole time I thought theonly reason I didn't like him was for the mere fact that he is Popeguy's boyfriend. I thought I was being unfair and if I just took the time to get to know him, everything wouldbe fine. But I was wrong. I've been looking back at Popeguy's past beaux and aside from the current one, there was only ever one other one I didn't like. So clearly, having a boyfriend is not the problem. It's the particular boyfriend.
He just isn't all that nice. Well, he's not mean. Actually, I feel like he's a poser. He's all timid and awkward and yet pulls out random flamboyancy from his ass. I know I'm biased and jealous and super protective, but I get these ugly vibes from him. I feel like theirs this darkness inside of him. It's not an obvious darkness by any means. Just a hint that I pick up every once in awhile. It doesn't help that he gives me the occassional nightmare either, does it? It's strange.
Besides, he's a pansy. He gets upset over the littlest and most stupidest things. He also tries to talk smack and then can't handle it when you show him up. But does he have the balls to do it to your face? No.
Ew. I don't know. I'm just so ready for him to be out of my life. When he's around, I can't interact with Popeguy the way I usually do. I feel like he tries to put all his attention on the BF so that he doesn't get mad and it just makes me feel weird. I'd rather hang out in another room. And I can feel the BF looking at me, watching my reactions and it kind of makes me uncomfortable. Weirdo.
Anyway, I almost thought he was out of my life. The two of them had this big talk the other night and Popeguy was really upset. And the things he was telling me...made it seem like it was over. But the pansy (pansie?) has been over since then. Twice today! Ugh. I had to deal with him when I got off of work. Then I had to deal with him again when Popeguy got off of work. Doesn't he have other places to be?
I just hate that when he's around, I can't talk to Popeguy. I feel like he sets his claim down and I'm not ready to assert mine with the way Popeguy and I were fighting the other week. But if the boy doesn't back off, I will remind him that I am number one. That he's a passing thing that won't be here forever. But Popeguy and I are best friends. We are in this in the long run. Because when I hate him and ignore him and wish I'd never met him, I still love him. And when I'm bitchy and spiteful and piss him off to the point where he does not want to see me, he still loves me. As long as I remember that, everything will be fine.
But if that joke of a boyfriend does not stop invading my private space, we are going to have problems. I don't mind if he comes over every once in a while, but twice in one day is a little too much to handle right now. I can't relax knowing he's in the other room...
scullerymaid at 1:42 a.m.