November 09, 2008
Come away with me
Diaryland. Sometimes I just want to go home. And it hits me suddenly, like now for instance. I don't know why, but all of a sudden I just feel glum and down. Is it because I have a paper to write? Is it because I'd rather be doing something else? why do my friends irk me for no apparent reason.
So I would love to go home. But who am I kidding? What home? Usually, I feel like I don't have a home. It's just a house where my family lives. And you know, I really do get excited when I'm on my way home. But it's onlymet by disappointment. I have a thirteen year old brother that smokes, openly. My mom stays in her room. It's dark. It's dirty. I'd never invite friends over to save my life. I don't even like other family to visit. So really, why go home, even when I really want to. there's nothing there.
I'm actually ready for us to move, and Mom says she's looking at a place. It sounds nice. Maybe a fresh beginning is what we need. I'd even let Squirt pick his room first since I don't live there anymore.
You know, sometimes I wish I had someone to run away with. I always imagine myself disappearing by myself, as I tend to do. But it would be nice to have someone with me. Someone that I can put up with for weeks at a time without feeling irked or neglected.
scullerymaid at 7:45 p.m.