January 15, 2007
Dirty
Last night I went to bed restless. Not with the usual restless feeling I have when I just need to get up and do something. This was different. I felt strange. Like... I don't even know, but I woke up with the same feeling. I guess it's like a mixture of forgetting something/being late for somehting. I don't know. I don't understand. I prayed and it didn't make me feel better like it usually does. It's this tightness in my chest. And I half want to cry half want to run, drown, swim, laugh, disappear. I want to claw the feeling out of me. I want to go to the country and sit in the middle of the field and just... let the world pass me by. To feel the wind, here the birds. I don't know what I'm saying.
I want to escape.
scullerymaid at 12:07 p.m.