December 12, 2015

Georgia

I'm avoiding looking at my student loans. My grandma was helping me out with those for awhile...and it seems as though her payments weren't going through for the last few months and I'm trying very hard not to freak out. So, I'm just not going to look at it for a few days. Which is silly of me, I know. Especially since I've been telling Brian to stop avoiding his own things that need handling. He has to sign up for health insurance and I've been encouraging him not to wait until the last minute to do it. Now look at me! At this point, I think I'm going to turn that into a January concern, but I really should look into deferment options. Just for a couple months until I can get everything else caught up. That's all I want to do. Is get everything current. I really wish I could find a little weekend job. Maybe I'll start applying to places again.

So Brian's cousin is getting married in the Spring. April or March I think, so he's driving to Georgia for the wedding. He has a plus one and I'm pretty sure he invited me to go with him last night. I'm not sure that he explicitly invited me, but I think so. Which would be so much fun! I think it would be an interesting next step in our relationship. By that time we'll have been dating for a year. Why not take a road trip! Obviously, now that I'm finally over the whole breakup thing, I've been thinking about our relationship a lot. In a good way. I really think we're good for each other. At least, I think he's good for me. I'm sure this sounds really cliche, but I feel like he grounds me. Like I'm always thinking thinking thinking and feeling feeling feeling and when I'm with him it's like everything goes quiet and it's just so nice. It's like my thoughts and feelings are more focused instead of being all over the place. When I'm with him, I feel like I want to do something more with myself. Be a better Tijuana and not the person that's just been floundering around for the last few years. I want to go to grad school because I want a career and not just because I'm trying to escape what I'm doing. Anyway, I'm just so very grateful for this relationship. I'm grateful for how playful he makes me feel. I'm grateful that there aren't a million fights everyday. I'm just grateful. He's just so accepting of who I am. And I hope he feels as though I'm good for him, too.

Anyway, Popeguy is flying in on Monday! I'm so excited to see him. We only see each other once a year now, and it's just not enough time. I wish I could afford to go visit him every once in awhile. One day. I'm also really excited to introduce him to Brian. I hope they get along.

scullerymaid at 8:50 p.m.

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